There must be something strangely sacred about salt. It is in our tears and in the sea.Kahlil Gibran
Those of us who’ve suffered one or more devastating losses often describe grief as being like the ocean with pain and longing breaking over us in waves. At times, the sadness is overwhelming, and we feel as though we’re drowning. But over time, we learn to float, to keep our head above water. We begin to recognize when the big waves are coming and become better able to deal with them. Although we never escape the sadness, we learn to navigate the waters of grief and move forward into the life we create in the wake of our loss.
During my darkest days, I found that the wisdom and experience of other grievers helped me to re-enter the world. They showed me that life after the death of a beloved was possible, that I could begin to see beauty, find grace and feel hope, even joy. They helped me realize that love was all around me, and all I had to do was lean in.
At Salt Water, our community can help you find your equilibrium and begin to heal after an unbearable loss. As Barbara Kingsolver put it so beautifully in High Tide in Tucson:
What a stroke of luck. What a singular brute feat of outrageous fortune: to be born into citizenship in the animal kingdom. We love and we lose, go back to the start and do it right over again. For every heavy forebrain solemnly cataloguing the facts of a harsh landscape, there’s a rush of intuition behind it crying out: High tide! Time to move out into the glorious debris. Time to take this life for what it is.
We invite you to become part of our community. Share your story, ask a question, make a comment. We’d love to hear from you.
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Re-Entry
Coming home from a weeklong retreat is always an emotional challenge for me.
“Re-entry” is what it’s referred to.
It starts the moment when I cross over Mt. Tamalpais, and the phone lights up with all of the messages I’ve missed while cut off from civilization.
Grief Becomes You
I want to tell you about my father. Specifically, the snapshot of us on a Fort Lauderdale Beach, me, at two or three years old, aloft on his shoulders, both of us squinting in the sun. He is holding my tiny, doughy feet in his hands. My palms are curved around the sides of his head. We look loose and easy, as if we’re sharing the same inside joke. This is a bookend.
Sometimes …
Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory. Dr. Seuss
This Is How You Do It
This is how you do it: you sit down at the keyboard, and you put one word after another until it’s done. It’s that easy and that hard. Neil Gaiman
Death Leading To Life
My friends are dying
and I am driving through a lush spring forest.
My friends are dying
and I am broken open to living.
Only Love Does That
In the flush of love’s light
we dare be brave
And suddenly we see
that love costs us all that we are
and will ever be
Yet is is only love
which sets us free
Maya Angelou
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