There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief … And unspeakable love …
Washington Irving

After the death of a beloved, there is no avoiding the overwhelming grief or the tears. In the immediate aftermath, we may be in shock, feel numb or even be in denial about the loss. Although everyone’s timetable is different, eventually we have to acknowledge the loss and how devastated we are. No matter how painful, we must sit with our grief and all that we’ve lost in order to start healing.

a close up image of a piece of paper with handwriting all over it

At Salt Water, we can help you learn to live with an unbearable loss. We offer ideas, strategies, tools and most importantly, hope that you can survive the death of someone you didn’t think you could live without.

We invite you to become part of our community. Share your story, ask a question, make a comment. We’d love to hear from you.

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Dad is seated wearing a white shirt; Mom is sitting next to him with her hands around his arm.

Another Life

There was another life I might have had, but I am having this one — Kazuo Ishiguro

The author, Pia Spector on graduation day wearing her black robe with a white dress underneath. Her now deceased then boyfriend is shown in profile on the right

Bargaining With Grief

No one likes to grieve. Grief is like anxiety; it lingers in the gut, it increases and decreases rapidly, tears come at odd times — each hour is punctuated by not knowing when the tears, the fear or the desperation will rise again.

Photo of a brownish rock structure against the milky way


We do not remember days, we remember moments — Cesare Pavese

Jimmy, Molly, Dan and Margo at the Rose Bowl, standing with their arms around each other. They are all wearing Stanford clothing and Dan has a tag around his neck with his Rose Bowl ticket in it.

Guilt is the Thief of Joy

Guilt is perhaps the most painful companion of death — Coco Chanel

Jimmy, Shannon and Theo at AT&T Park. Jimmy is wearing an orange SF Giants cap, a gray Giants' sweatshirt and blue jeans. Shannon is wearing sunglasses, a dark shirt and dark pants. Theo is wearing a Giants' cap, an orange Giants' sweatshirt and carrying an orange Giants towel

The Unimaginable

If you have seen Hamilton, you know the scene. Phillip, Alexander Hamilton’s son, has died, and Alexander and Eliza, his wife, have moved uptown. The chorus repeats “can you imagine?”, “it is quiet uptown” and then the words most striking to me: “they are going through the unimaginable”. Tears were streaming down my face as I […]

Lady Gaga on stage wearing a white jacket and a pink hat with the microphone in her left hand close to her face


If you could, I know that you’d stay. We both know things don’t work that way. Lady Gaga

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