They ask – how are you?

You respond I’m fine, but are you really?

Of course not. You pretend so you don’t have to talk, and they don’t have to listen.

You look fine from the outside, but inside, you are melting, shriveling, disappearing and hiding from yourself.

How is your day going, they ask?

You smile and say fine. But is it really fine? Of course not. You just heard his favorite song or walked past his favorite food or thought of a memory. You really want to scream – I’m not fine. I’m angry. I’m screwed up for life. I don’t want to be here!!

But you can’t say anything because you are “fine.”

How are you they ask?? I’m fine but am I ??

Well… would you be fine? This is why we or I pretend I am. We never will really be fine.

We just exist on the outside and become extinct on the inside.

How are you? they ask. You smile like always, take a deep breath and say, “I’m fine. “