Her absence is like the sky, spread over everything
C.S. Lewis
Jen Hurley Klee on life after the death of her husband, Matt:
“How are you doing?” is such a difficult question for me to answer … “a beautiful mess” seems like the most appropriate response. Yes, I am living my life – but everywhere I go, there is a huge piece of me that is missing. It feels as though I am two miles into an uphill marathon that will never end – and just because I keep moving forward, it does not mean that any of this has gotten any easier. I’m just moving forward because it’s the only way I know how to go.
Elizabeth Alexander on life after the death of her husband, Ficre:
We’re alive. Life goes on. My children are healthy and happy and fulfilled. As am I. We all have our work to do. They have their schoolwork to do. They have college ahead of them. This is what their father would have wanted. This is how we built them to live rich and useful and beautiful lives. So my job was to carry that forward. Not in a way that says we are not grieving or shut that feeling down. But that says we are alive and we walk forward.
Connect – learn – be inspired – heal – walk forward with us
Some of our favorite resources on losing a spouse:
- The Light of the World – Elizabeth Alexander’s poetic memoir about the death of her husband, Ficre and the aftermath
- Both Sides Now: A True Story of Love, Loss and Bold Living – Nancy Sharp’s beautiful memoir of her husband’s illness and death and how she forged a new life for herself and her children in the wake of her husband’s death
- About Alice – Calvin Trillin’s moving tribute to his wife Alice
- What Forty Steps Taught Me About Love and Grief – Actress Tembi Locke’s TED talk about caring for her now deceased husband and how grief transforms
- Uncoupled: Dealing with the Death of a Spouse – a powerful video in which four bereaved spouses speak about their loss, the early days after their spouses’ deaths, what helped, what didn’t, how they adjusted to being single and how they “turned a page”
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