I lost my oldest brother Rudy in December 2016. It was sudden and still to this day, a shock. Sudden death or “out of order” deaths are harder to deal with, in my opinion. I have lost people to cancer, old age, other health issues, but nothing has ever compared to how we lost Rudy. It was a car accident. We had no warning, and we are still here three and a half years later trying to pick up the pieces.
Not able to breathe
not wanting to die so soon
Your fear kissed me.
At nine years old, I felt invincible. Hardship felt foreign. As is true for many nine-year-olds, the world felt like a safe, welcoming place.
Death is hard. Dealing with an unexpected death is GUT wrenching, soul crushing, honestly the worst kind of hurt in the world. I never thought at 25 that I would have to bury my 33-year-old brother. Rudy was our rock, our planner, our movie guru. […]