Upon Awakening

I am a mother, grandmother, teacher; shattered by the loss of the greatest love I have ever been privileged to share, attempting to adopt the poetry and principles of those who have endured before me.

Your voice gently whispering,
Come here
If we had drifted out of each other’s arms
During our slumber

Always coming back together
Face to face
Wrapped up in each other
So deeply steeped in love and gratitude
In the darkness of the early morn

Upon awakening
How I long to hear the gentle cadence of your voice once again

Instead, I cry into the vast silence

How I long to lean into you and your love
Instead, I find myself lost in the now
Empty space in our bed that was yours

Always an undercurrent that we would run out of time,
I would tell you of my trepidations

‘The universe would not gift us this love
To take it right back’

You would reassure me

This bed is empty
Your toothbrush dry
Your phone charger hanging from the outlet
No phone to charge

Your reading glasses untouched
Next to the last
Book you read aloud to me

The bouquet of flowers you brought me the night before
I joyfully arranged
While you showered
Now dead and drying in my garage

Your truck that you used to call up from with ‘I love yous’ at the end of my drive
Now parked unused at your boys’ house

Are we forever etched in one another’s hearts and embedded in each other’s souls as we regularly affirmed

Or will this
Heart rending sorrow
The joy, peace, and passion
We shared

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